It’s time to lighten up and have some fun! Let’s talk about the elephant in the room – the traps (eek) of personal development or spiritual life. I’m guilty of a few of these in my time. I’ll reveal mine at the end of this post. We don’t need to do earnest with personal development stuff all the time. Here are my top 12.
1. Where are all the Awesome People?
You are radiating goodness, light, positivity. And the pay off? Needy people come flocking. They want what you got! “What happened to attracting awesome people on my level? So, much for all that hard work on myself.” Doh. That’s life.
2. Bleeding Heart Syndrome
Your compassion for people has blossomed open. Everyone is so lovely!! You’ve decided to see the best in everyone. Life is awesome! You can’t see it yet but you have a big red target on your back. Users have a laser like focus for kind people. Oh, I thought I’d be attracting all these awesome people in my life. Oh no, back to that lament again. All I can say is boundaries baby. Practice discernment, love and self love.
3. I Somehow Ended up Self Absorbed.
You just know you will attract the right friends/soulmate/workplace. You are busy working on yourself, making yourself great. Problem is, everything is about you you you. Every single day. That potential soul mate thinks you are self absorbed. Didn’t see that coming did you? Time to chill out. Change your focus to others. And use your powers for good. Community service. Walk your neighbor’s dog. You know what I mean.
4. I’m a Thinker not a Doer
You analyse everything to death, pretty sure you got it all figured out. Yep, you may have. But that’s a cheat’s game. You gotta do the work and implement. To everyone else you just seem stuck and spend a lot of time staring into space at the coffee shop, on the couch, at the laundrette …
5. Fatal Flaw Epidemic
You become so aware, and possibly enlightened??, you see all the fatal flaws in everyone you know. Why can’t they sort there shit out? Why can’t they see their issue and why don’t they fix it. If only, they … back to work kiddo and worry about yourself. Is their a bit of denial going on about your own stuff? Their business is their business. And yours is yours.
6. I’m Going to Help You – Lucky Aren’t You?
If people would just listen to you, you could help them. You think you’re the only one who is right. And your way is right. Guess what. You’re actually annoying them. They kinda don’t care. And they may even think you’re a bit tutty fruity if you know what I mean. Time to chill. Do you want to listen to that cricket or basketball nut all day?
7. Compulsive Angel Card Reader
You read angel/tarot cards everyday. And when you don’t like the cards you do another spread straightaway. Awesome. Life path changed. And you get to change your life path in 24 hours again. Awesomeness times two, no three.
8. My Body Has All the Answers
You’re so busy listening to your body you bang into things or trip, and forget the mind has cognitive abilities for a reason. Listening to your body ALL the time is not healthy. Yes, sometimes it is. From a neuroplasticity point of view you could be just listening to old patterns in your body that need updating. That’s what the brain is for. Practise wisdom, cool clear headed judgement and discernment.
9. Why Me?
When you are doing personal development you attract the lessons you need to learn. Huh! I thought this was going to improve my life! Yep, this one sucks. Think long term. And enjoy the now. That’s the way the universe rolls.
10. Liar Liar Pants on Fire
You focus on positivity so much that really you’re just kind of lying. And you’re annoying everyone around you. If your day sucks, that’s okay! It’s good to filter for the positive experiences in your life but not to the level when you are in denial of what’s going on.
11. Neurotic Overkill
You are accessing your intuition and inner wisdom. But, you go overboard and read into every little nuance of the other person, trying to figure them out. That twitching cheek muscle means something right? You’ve slipped over the edge from intuitive to neurotic. Stop trying to read people. Intuition is not trying to read every situation. It’s paying attention when your inner wisdom speaks.
You’re draining your energy by not sitting in YOU and making yourself wired and anxious. Again, their business is their business. And yours is yours. Trust your instincts to fire off when they need to.
You may also like to read 8 Top Habits that Create a Bad Relationship to Self or How I Changed my Friendships with this Radical Move.
12. I Gotta Work on …
And finally, there is no point to this one. But I saw it on someone’s twitter feed and it made me laugh out loud. Sorry, I can’t credit it. “You think ‘I gotta work on my shit, man.’ You thought that in 2013, 2016, just yesterday and probably tomorrow.”
Guilty as Charged
I did the compulsive angel card thing for a bit. Now, when life sucks I still find myself inching towards that drawer. The buzz it gives you when you get a good card is way healthier than a bar of chocolate! But, if you don’t take action then no amount of tarot or angel cards readings are going to work. It’s up there with compulsively checking Facebook. Just say no!
I also went through the bleeding heart compassion stage. You feel good entering into that phase. All loved up with the universe. But users and needy people, come in and killjoy all around. Had to get those boundaries back quick smart. Street smarts are there for a reason. Still stuffing this one up on occasion. And some of the others I’ve gone through a phase or two. That’s life.
On a more serious note, these are common traps on the spiritual path. So, do think about what your tendency is and lighten up about it.
And my final note is from Rachel from the TV show Friends, my all time favourite quote, ‘I was so busy trying to not become my mother, I became my father instead. I didn’t see that coming.’
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